{"id":397,"date":"2011-04-04T21:17:06","date_gmt":"2011-04-05T02:17:06","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/?p=397"},"modified":"2025-11-29T07:38:39","modified_gmt":"2025-11-29T13:38:39","slug":"how-to-conquer-whining","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/2011\/04\/04\/how-to-conquer-whining\/","title":{"rendered":"How to Conquer Whining?"},"content":{"rendered":"

I use Mondays to clear out my mailbag. This week’s question deals with cranky kids. Read on for our best advice on how to conquer whining.<\/em><\/p>\n

\"Monday<\/p>\n

Question: How can I train my child to stop whining?<\/h2>\n

Dear Jennifer:<\/p>\n

My two-year old has developed a bad habit of whining, and it\u2019s driving the rest of the family crazy. Is there something I can do to curb this? Or do we just have to wait for him to grow out of this stage?<\/p>\n

Getting Frustrated<\/p>\n

\"Sure<\/p>\n

Answer: These six strategies work wonders with whiners!<\/h2>\n

Dear Frustrated: <\/p>\n

What you\u2019re describing may indeed be a stage, but I’ve got good news. There are definitely things you can do to help your child outgrow it more quickly. To effectively conquer whining requires patient and consistent application of the following six strategies (which I originally shared on my marriage & motherhood blog, Loving Life at Home<\/a>):<\/p>\n

    \n
  1. \n

    Commitment<\/h2>\n

    Explain to your little boy that his behavior is making it hard for anyone to enjoy his company. Assure him that you love him regardless how he acts, but that you want other people to love him, too, so you\u2019re going to do whatever it takes to help him break his bad habit of whining.<\/li>\n

  2. \n

    Consequences<\/h2>\n

    Whenever you give in to whining, you are rewarding and reinforcing such behavior. This must stop immediately. If you hope to help your child overcome this habit, you must make certain his whining never pays off<\/a>. When he is begging for something he doesn\u2019t really need, like candy at the checkout counter, then deprive him of it completely. When he’s whining for something he genuinely does need, like a drink of water when he\u2019s thirsty, then insist that he ask nicely before you give it.<\/li>\n

  3. \n

    Cheerfulness<\/h2>\n

    Be careful to model a cheerful, happy disposition yourself. If you are angry and impatient in your responses to your child, your efforts to modulate his behavior will fall flat. In the above example, when your little boy whines for water, fill the cup, get down on his level, smile broadly, and prompt him, \u201cDo you remember the nice way to ask?\u201d Or simply say the words you want and let him parrot them back: \u201cWater, please?\u201d If you\u2019ll teach your child how to say please in sign language (by rubbing his open hand on his chest in a circular motion), then you can even help him \u201csay please\u201d when he is too upset to utter the words. Gently guide his hand through the motion, then respond enthusiastically, \u201cSee? Isn\u2019t that a much nicer way to ask?\u201d as you give him his water.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

    [read the remaining 3 tips at Loving Life at Home<\/a>]<\/p>\n

    \"Family<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

    I use Mondays to clear out my mailbag. This week’s question deals with cranky kids. Read on for our best advice on how to conquer whining. 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Jennifer: We have five\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Health"","block_context":{"text":"Health","link":"https:\/\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/category\/health\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"Exercising with Kids","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/11\/pexels-gustavo-fring-3985235.jpeg?fit=1024%2C685&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/11\/pexels-gustavo-fring-3985235.jpeg?fit=1024%2C685&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/11\/pexels-gustavo-fring-3985235.jpeg?fit=1024%2C685&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2010\/11\/pexels-gustavo-fring-3985235.jpeg?fit=1024%2C685&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":1304,"url":"https:\/\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/2011\/06\/04\/mailbag-finding-time-for-intimacy\/","url_meta":{"origin":397,"position":2},"title":"How Do We Find Time for Intimacy?","author":"Jennifer Flanders","date":"June 4, 2011","format":false,"excerpt":"I'm slowly but surely clearing out the messages in my inbox. This week's mailbag question deals with finding time for intimacy. Question: How do we find time for intimacy? Dear Jennifer: My husband and I have three children, but ever since the second was born, I have felt stretched to\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Mailbag"","block_context":{"text":"Mailbag","link":"https:\/\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/category\/mailbag\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"finding time for intimacy","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/06\/Time-for-Intimacy-IG.png?fit=1024%2C1024&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/06\/Time-for-Intimacy-IG.png?fit=1024%2C1024&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/06\/Time-for-Intimacy-IG.png?fit=1024%2C1024&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/06\/Time-for-Intimacy-IG.png?fit=1024%2C1024&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":10610,"url":"https:\/\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/2015\/04\/13\/mailbag-monday-celebrity-look-alikes\/","url_meta":{"origin":397,"position":3},"title":"Mailbag Monday: Celebrity Look-Alikes","author":"Jennifer Flanders","date":"April 13, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"I use Mondays to clear out my mailbag. This week we're discussing celebrity look-alikes, since our family has several. Want proof? Read on to examine the compelling photographic evidence yourself. Question: Did you ever notice? Dear Mr. & Mrs. Flanders, Has anybody ever told you your son looks like Ashton\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Humor"","block_context":{"text":"Humor","link":"https:\/\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/category\/humor\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"Grayson and Alfred E Newman","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/04\/Grayson-and-Alfred-E-Newman.png?fit=1024%2C1022&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/04\/Grayson-and-Alfred-E-Newman.png?fit=1024%2C1022&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/04\/Grayson-and-Alfred-E-Newman.png?fit=1024%2C1022&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/04\/Grayson-and-Alfred-E-Newman.png?fit=1024%2C1022&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":8902,"url":"https:\/\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/2014\/11\/10\/mailbag-monday-report-cards-for-middle-schoolers\/","url_meta":{"origin":397,"position":4},"title":"Mailbag Monday: Report Cards for Middle Schoolers","author":"Jennifer Flanders","date":"November 10, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"My inbox is overflowing with questions from readers, so I've decided to tackle one per week until I get it cleaned out. Here's the first: Dear Jennifer, I just viewed your printable report card and I really like it; however, I have a middle school student and the reading and\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Fall"","block_context":{"text":"Fall","link":"https:\/\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/category\/fall\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"Free printable report cards for middle schoolers","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/11\/Printable-Grade-Reports-for-Jr.-High.jpg?fit=400%2C529&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":15195,"url":"https:\/\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/2016\/05\/23\/mailbag-arguments-friendships-and-purity\/","url_meta":{"origin":397,"position":5},"title":"Mailbag: Arguments, Friendships, and Purity","author":"Jennifer Flanders","date":"May 23, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"Several of the questions we've received from readers lately deal with topics better suited to our other blogs: avoiding arguments in marriage, navigating friendships with the opposite sex, and maintaining purity as a single person. So we've taken the liberty of answering them there. Click through the links to read\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Mailbag"","block_context":{"text":"Mailbag","link":"https:\/\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/category\/mailbag\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"10 Tips to help couples Quit Quarreling","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/05\/How-to-Stop-Arguing.png?fit=700%2C707&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/05\/How-to-Stop-Arguing.png?fit=700%2C707&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/05\/How-to-Stop-Arguing.png?fit=700%2C707&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/05\/How-to-Stop-Arguing.png?fit=700%2C707&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]}],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/04\/Surefire-Way-to-Wipe-Out-Whining.png?fit=1024%2C1030&ssl=1","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/397","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=397"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/397\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":85587,"href":"https:\/\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/397\/revisions\/85587"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/29216"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=397"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=397"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=397"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}