{"id":14770,"date":"2016-04-04T21:30:23","date_gmt":"2016-04-05T02:30:23","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/?p=14770"},"modified":"2021-12-02T07:18:42","modified_gmt":"2021-12-02T13:18:42","slug":"mailbag-do-you-need-to-take-a-look-in-the-mirror","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/2016\/04\/04\/mailbag-do-you-need-to-take-a-look-in-the-mirror\/","title":{"rendered":"Do You Need to Take a Look in the Mirror?"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/04\/pexels-elizaveta-dushechkina-3727175.jpeg?resize=1024%2C697&#038;ssl=1\" alt=\"Do You Need to Look in the Mirror?\" width=\"1024\" height=\"697\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-31442\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/04\/pexels-elizaveta-dushechkina-3727175.jpeg?w=1024&amp;ssl=1 1024w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/04\/pexels-elizaveta-dushechkina-3727175.jpeg?resize=600%2C408&amp;ssl=1 600w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/04\/pexels-elizaveta-dushechkina-3727175.jpeg?resize=300%2C204&amp;ssl=1 300w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/04\/pexels-elizaveta-dushechkina-3727175.jpeg?resize=768%2C523&amp;ssl=1 768w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 1024px) 100vw, 1024px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>My husband and I get lots of messages from folks who read our blogs (my <a href=\"http:\/\/lovinglifeathome.com\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Loving Life at Home<\/a> and his <a href=\"http:\/\/alltruthisgodstruth.com\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">All Truth is God&#8217;s Truth<\/a>, in addition to <a href=\"https:\/\/www.flandersfamily.info\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">this family blog<\/a>).<\/p>\n<p><strong>Sadly, many of the comments we receive are negative<\/strong>, like the people who claim I&#8217;m <a href=\"https:\/\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/age-appropriate-chores-for-children\/\">robbing my children of their childhood <\/a>by requiring them to do chores. Or the woman who <a href=\"https:\/\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/how-to-respond-to-your-toddlers-temper-tantrums\/\">accused me of being sexist<\/a> because I used masculine pronouns to answer another reader&#8217;s question (about her son). Or the one who thought <a href=\"https:\/\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/budgeting-tips\/#comment-3559371410044623080\">it was selfish of me<\/a> to pray for Waverly Fabric at a price I could afford (God answered anyway &#8212; I found 40 yards of the exact pattern I wanted at a garage sale for 25-cents a yard!).<\/p>\n<p>That&#8217;s why <strong>it feels like a breath of fresh air when we hear from people who actually <em>like<\/em> something we&#8217;ve written<\/strong>, like the following reader.<\/p>\n<p><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/08\/QandA-e1502117579745.png?resize=1024%2C367&#038;ssl=1\" alt=\"Monday Mailbag\" width=\"1024\" height=\"367\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-18993\" \/><\/p>\n<h2>Exactly what I needed, but not what I went looking for<\/h2>\n<p>Dear Jennifer,<\/p>\n<p>Have you ever gone looking for a laser pointer and God hands you a mirror instead? That&#8217;s what happened to me recently. We are currently expecting blessing number 5, have more than we deserve, and are surrounded with beautiful, faithful friends.<\/p>\n<p>Still, life gets busy and stressful and people get cranky. Things here had been tense for no apparent reason, but tense none the less. My husband and I had a couple of disagreements in which I ended up yelling at him. <strong>I found myself feeling completely entitled as I <em>&#8220;typically keep my mouth shut and he needed to hear it&#8221;<\/em>. <\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Fortunately <strong>as I was busy trying to find that laser pointer to shine on all my husbands faults, God provided me a mirror through 2 of your posts<\/strong>:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>&#8220;<a href=\"http:\/\/lovinglifeathome.com\/2015\/09\/27\/7-ways-to-ruin-your-marriage\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">7 Ways to Ruin Your Marriage<\/a>&#8221; and<\/li>\n<li> &#8220;<a href=\"http:\/\/lovinglifeathome.com\/2012\/08\/06\/25-ways-to-communicate-respect\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">25 Ways to Communicate Respect<\/a>&#8220;.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<h2>Taking a look in the mirror and changing my focus<\/h2>\n<p>With these tools <strong>I was able to get off my high horse<\/strong> and see the errors (intended to be plural) in my ways.<\/p>\n<p>I was focusing on my needs and his mistakes. Heaven forbid anyone follow me around and point out every time I don&#8217;t get it quite right. <strong>I immediately put into action your suggestions<\/strong> and even sent him a list of specific things I would be doing to honor him and this family.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Thank you for being a light even when it shines in places we don&#8217;t want to see.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>BTW, I&#8217;ll leave out <strong>the positive impact it&#8217;s had on our &#8220;alone time&#8221;<\/strong>. \ud83d\ude09 Thanks again and May God Bless you abundantly.<\/p>\n<p>(Name Withheld)<\/p>\n<p><strong>Has anything like that ever happened to you?<br \/>\n<\/strong><\/p>\n<h2>Have you ever gone hunting for a laser to point out someone else&#8217;s faults, but God handed you a mirror instead? <\/h2>\n<p>It shouldn&#8217;t surprise us that He would do such a thing. After all, Jesus warned us about the danger of trying to remove a speck from another&#8217;s eye when we have a log in our own. (<a href=\"http:\/\/biblehub.com\/luke\/6-42.htm\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Luke 6:42<\/a>)<\/p>\n<p><strong>Is there anything in your eye right now that&#8217;s obstructing your vision?<\/strong> How will you go about getting it out? <\/p>\n<p>Take a long look in the mirror, and act on what you see. Be a doer of the Word, not just a hearer that deludes herself. (<a href=\"https:\/\/biblehub.com\/context\/james\/1-22.htm\" rel=\"noopener\" target=\"_blank\">James 1:22-23<\/a>) <\/p>\n<p>Interested in reading the eye-opening posts mentioned above? Then follow these links:<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/lovinglifeathome.com\/2012\/08\/06\/25-ways-to-communicate-respect\/\" rel=\"noopener\" target=\"_blank\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/04\/25-Ways-to-Communicate-Respect-FB.png?resize=1024%2C733&#038;ssl=1\" alt=\"25 Ways to Communicate Respect\" width=\"1024\" height=\"733\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-31447\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/04\/25-Ways-to-Communicate-Respect-FB.png?w=1024&amp;ssl=1 1024w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/04\/25-Ways-to-Communicate-Respect-FB.png?resize=600%2C429&amp;ssl=1 600w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/04\/25-Ways-to-Communicate-Respect-FB.png?resize=300%2C215&amp;ssl=1 300w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/04\/25-Ways-to-Communicate-Respect-FB.png?resize=768%2C550&amp;ssl=1 768w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 1024px) 100vw, 1024px\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/lovinglifeathome.com\/2015\/09\/27\/7-ways-to-ruin-your-marriage\/\" rel=\"noopener\" target=\"_blank\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/04\/7-Ways-to-Ruin-Your-Marriage-FB.png?resize=1024%2C736&#038;ssl=1\" alt=\"7 Ways to Ruin Your Marriage\" width=\"1024\" height=\"736\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-31448\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/04\/7-Ways-to-Ruin-Your-Marriage-FB.png?w=1024&amp;ssl=1 1024w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/04\/7-Ways-to-Ruin-Your-Marriage-FB.png?resize=600%2C431&amp;ssl=1 600w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/04\/7-Ways-to-Ruin-Your-Marriage-FB.png?resize=300%2C216&amp;ssl=1 300w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/04\/7-Ways-to-Ruin-Your-Marriage-FB.png?resize=768%2C552&amp;ssl=1 768w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 1024px) 100vw, 1024px\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<h2>More Secrets to a Successful, God-Honoring Marriage<\/h2>\n<p>And for more marriage wisdom and encouragement, check out the following books. They reject the faulty thinking of modern-day culture and build instead upon clear, biblical principles that are both time-tested and effective.<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/amzn.to\/3a4NFmc\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">Love Your Husband\/ Love Yourself: Embracing God&#8217;s Purpose for Passion in Marriage<\/a><\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/amzn.to\/3abOfOY\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">25 Way to Communicate Respect for Your Husband: A Handbook for Wives<\/a><\/li>\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/amzn.to\/3cuUfEn\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\">25 Ways to Show Love to Your Wife: A Handbook for Husbands<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/amzn.to\/3a4NFmc\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\" target=\"_blank\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/lovinglifeathome.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/02\/Love-Your-Husband-Love-Yourself-Talk.png?resize=1024%2C724&#038;ssl=1\" alt=\"Love Your Husband\/ Love Yourself: Embracing God&#039;s Purpose for Passion in Marriage\" width=\"1024\" height=\"724\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-9472\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>PLEASE NOTE: <em>This post contains affiliate links. If you make a purchase through any of those links, we may receive a small referral fee, at no extra cost to you. Such fees help defray the cost of running this website. This, in turn, allows us to continue offering our readers a wealth of FREE printable resources. So thank you for your support! <\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>My husband and I get lots of messages from folks who read our blogs (my Loving Life at Home and his All Truth is God&#8217;s Truth, in addition to this&#8230;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":31442,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"wprm-recipe-roundup-name":"","wprm-recipe-roundup-description":"","_kadence_starter_templates_imported_post":false,"_kad_post_transparent":"","_kad_post_title":"","_kad_post_layout":"","_kad_post_sidebar_id":"","_kad_post_content_style":"","_kad_post_vertical_padding":"","_kad_post_feature":"","_kad_post_feature_position":"","_kad_post_header":false,"_kad_post_footer":false,"_kad_post_classname":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[10],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-14770","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-mailbag"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v27.5 (Yoast SEO v27.5) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-premium-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Do You Need to Take a Look in the Mirror? 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It's a choice to act in\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Coloring Pages&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Coloring Pages","link":"https:\/\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/category\/free-printables\/coloring-pages\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"Love in Deed and Truth (Free Printable Coloring Page)","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/05\/Screen-Shot-2019-05-06-at-3.23.03-PM.png?fit=990%2C990&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/05\/Screen-Shot-2019-05-06-at-3.23.03-PM.png?fit=990%2C990&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/05\/Screen-Shot-2019-05-06-at-3.23.03-PM.png?fit=990%2C990&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/05\/Screen-Shot-2019-05-06-at-3.23.03-PM.png?fit=990%2C990&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":83462,"url":"https:\/\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/2024\/08\/19\/bill-clinton-coloring-page-a-quote-i-actually-agree-with\/","url_meta":{"origin":14770,"position":3},"title":"Bill Clinton Coloring Page (&amp; a Quote I Actually Agree with)","author":"Jennifer Flanders","date":"August 19, 2024","format":false,"excerpt":"Did you know August 19 is Bill Clinton's birthday? That's today! Which makes this the perfect time to share the following Bill Clinton quote coloring page. While I cannot endorse the majority of Clinton's policies, positions, or behavior before, during, or after his presidential term, he has said one thing\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Coloring Pages&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Coloring Pages","link":"https:\/\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/category\/free-printables\/coloring-pages\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"Bill Clinton Coloring Page","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/08\/Bill-Clinton-Coloring-Page-IG.png?fit=1024%2C1024&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/08\/Bill-Clinton-Coloring-Page-IG.png?fit=1024%2C1024&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/08\/Bill-Clinton-Coloring-Page-IG.png?fit=1024%2C1024&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/08\/Bill-Clinton-Coloring-Page-IG.png?fit=1024%2C1024&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":15769,"url":"https:\/\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/2016\/07\/18\/mailbag-what-do-you-tell-your-kids-about-santa\/","url_meta":{"origin":14770,"position":4},"title":"Telling Children the Truth about Santa","author":"Jennifer Flanders","date":"July 18, 2016","format":false,"excerpt":"Question: Do you tell your children about Santa Claus? Why or why not? Answer: This week's question is one that has been posed to us often over the years -- especially back when all our children were little. Do we tell our kids about Santa? The answer is yes and\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Christmas&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Christmas","link":"https:\/\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/category\/holidays-2\/christmas\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"Teaching Children the Truth about Santa","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/07\/Teaching-Children-about-Santa.png?fit=1024%2C1024&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/07\/Teaching-Children-about-Santa.png?fit=1024%2C1024&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/07\/Teaching-Children-about-Santa.png?fit=1024%2C1024&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/07\/Teaching-Children-about-Santa.png?fit=1024%2C1024&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":18188,"url":"https:\/\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/2017\/03\/26\/take-every-thought-captive-coloring-page\/","url_meta":{"origin":14770,"position":5},"title":"Take Every Thought Captive (Coloring Page)","author":"Jennifer Flanders","date":"March 26, 2017","format":false,"excerpt":"It's Sunday, so it's time to share another of my free printable coloring pages. The Bible commands us to take every thought captive, and this week's coloring page provides a beautiful reminder of that directive. click to print this Take Every Thought Captive coloring page The thing I love about\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Coloring Pages&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Coloring Pages","link":"https:\/\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/category\/free-printables\/coloring-pages\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"Take Every Thought Captive Coloring Page","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/03\/Take-Every-Thought-Captive-Coloring-Page-IG.png?fit=1024%2C1024&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/03\/Take-Every-Thought-Captive-Coloring-Page-IG.png?fit=1024%2C1024&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/03\/Take-Every-Thought-Captive-Coloring-Page-IG.png?fit=1024%2C1024&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/03\/Take-Every-Thought-Captive-Coloring-Page-IG.png?fit=1024%2C1024&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/14770","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=14770"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/14770\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":31450,"href":"https:\/\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/14770\/revisions\/31450"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/31442"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=14770"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=14770"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.flandersfamily.info\/web\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=14770"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}